Posts

Showing posts from March, 2010

DAY 9: What Am I Doing?!

The New Dictionary of Modern Moslems Says... Sin: Something we don't like when we think about having it, but love it when we we're doing it. Taubat: An act of stopping doing something sinful, especially on bad days (exams,quizzes, getting sick etc.) Solat: An act of worshipping Allah, usually once a week on Friday,but sometimes not at all. Doa: A prayer which usually done in hesitance after solat, usually because of having things to do more important than doa itself. Aurat: (1)Parts of the body which should only be covered when there's a need to (kelas agama,orang mati,nak menikah etc.) (2) Parts of the body which should be covered,with what ever materials we think appropriate (tight clothes, sheer clothes, air) (3) Parts of the body that should not be watch,or touched by non-mahram, yet can be watched in pornographic materials or touch when you are 'about' to be a mahram (boyfriends, girlfriends etc.) Religion: A believe that should be, well, believed, not practice

DAY 8: LOSING GRIP

I wrote and deleted for more than three times today. Guess God don’t give me much of ilham because I did terrible on the 4th – 8th day of mission. To say the least. Right now, I don’t have the courage to write anymore. It’s not that I don’t want to, it’s more that I can’t. Right now i just want to take some time for myself,be alone for a while and muhasabah [ i did my muhasabah with my blog] What happened during the five days? Lemme just say that I lost focus gradually- and today is the worst. Ever. Or just imagine me before,one with no mission. That’s my terrible five days. Okay-lah. I don’t want to delete again. Salam. Next post will be tomorrow insha-Allah. I hope so. P/S: It's hard if you fight it. Just...blend in. “If she won’t leave your thoughts even when you try to keep her away, perhaps the answer lies in keeping her closer to your heart.” -Remus Lupin-

busy

Too busy working on my life...my mission. Till I can't up date it here.See? It's 2 am now...And just for a while,a moment... Jangan marah Orang yang marah hanyalah orang yang lemah Tak cukup kuat melawan emosi Jangan dendam Orang yang berdendam hanyalah orang lemah Asyik mengadu kerana tak tahan ujian Bersabarlah Orang penyabar adalah orang cukup kuat menahan marah Cukup faham pula, yang ujian itu hanya ujian [ingatan buat aku yang lemah dan salah] maaf aku bila aku marah maaf aku bila dendam teman

DAY 3: KATA+BUAT+DENGAR = KETEGAQ

DAY 3: KATA+BUAT+DENGAR = KETEGAQ Sundays start lazy and end up busy. After spending day lazily, you will realize how busy you are at night when you start to remember of all works and assignments, tests and quizzes that lie for another 5 days to come. Day three was no exception. And I feel bad to say that, my Sunday didn’t start good. Going to change that though. You can’t lose your 40 days mission just because of a lousy devil and some sleep and dreams. Malam ni tidoq awai na? Mission I set for day three is: to hear only good things. To say only good things. To do only good things. It sounded like ABC or 123 or alif,ba,ta; but believe me, it was such a rocket sciences. Till now, I still cannot decipher the holy code of how can I avoid hearing, saying and doing bad things. And oh, i had try the “ choose your friends wisely”. What I’m saying now is the few cases that words slipped out of my mouth, or slipped into my ears. May God help me with this. Or should I wear mask and earphone

DAY 2: MUALLAF

DAY 2: MUALLAF It was raining all day. As if God blessed me and my mission. And I’m sure He is. The sky is grey with rain clouds, yet the subtlety of the sunray hitting the ground gave me a glimpse of hope. That today things will be just fine. And so it was. One of the highlights for day two is I finally watched late Yasmin Ahmad’s film – Muallaf. A bit too late eh? Some of the jokes are cheesy, but as long as they are funny, who cares? But the main theme might be new,or radical to some. How the film discussed the questions of religions baffled me. The film was controversial at one time, that it was banned. Was. Well,watch it yourself. It is not as bad what as what I expected. But certainly it was better than films that show 99% social ill, 1% moral value(s???). Who loves sarcasm,go watch Muallaf. One clear lesson l learnt today is; to be able to change and be good, choose your friends wisely. Be choosy, not picky.Yeah, I can’t understand that last line either, huhu. All I

DAY 1: I GOT MY HAIR CUT

I'm going on my 40 days mission.A 40 consequent days mission. A mission of me, finding Him. May he give me the chance to stand still to the very end, the 40th day. DAY 1: I GOT MY HAIR CUT It was a rainy Friday , when this crazy thoughts came to me , of me going on a 40 days mission. This is so crazy to me, that if you noticed, i already said 40 for the fifth time. It is not the mission that sounded crazy, it's the length of time . You see, I can't even keep my promises for more than a week. and 40 days? that's almost 6 weeks!!! this mission I imagined to be torturous at first, and I think it will slowly change me to (I hope) a better me. why 40? : I've heard this one, that says " If we were to be able to create a habit, it will be after 40 days. something like that. why now? : why not now? how? : determination. yang tak berbelah bagi . unconditional determination . and putting this on the blog, is just one determination. Just to kick-start this mission, i

Anak Polis

Dear friend, The ignorance and the silence They never bug me no more Because they are killing me The look in the eyes The unexplainable, uncomfortable gestures Just a very much murderous reminder That I’m not needed no more I hate the roller-coaster so much now Because I’d be damned if I drop low After I’m at high Dear friend, my dearest friend You don’t need to worry about me anymore Because you hearing me keeps bugging me, of why you treat me good When so many else don’t I’m sorry if this hurting you I never meant to Dear friend, Having you as my friend Is one huge undeletable spot in my mind One huge too in my heart Maybe because we have so many fond moments together Or having too many boring moments too, together Or maybe of the twin thingy between us You may wonder why I wrote this But please, If by any God’s-will chance that I’m dead after this Don’t you ever tell Kosmo! that I know that my time has come Death’s painful enough without the cheesiness Guess what? After rereading t

Give

Sometimes it is just not enough To give in That’s why I think I’m giving up The last time I checked I had hole for my heart When I’m chasing shadow One that I shouldn’t chase For one too many For one too long

Tiga

Adakah aku perlu menanggung seorang Apa yang terlihat mata ketiga ku Mata yang memandang tembus Jernih atas niat dalam hati manusia Berikan aku satu insan Nescaya dapat aku baca jiwa kotornya Akan terselami niat buruknya Dari wajah terkerut dahi Atau gelisah goncangan kaki Lalu adakah perlu aku menanggung seorang Rasa syak dan was-wasku Hanya kerana dunia tak bersedia Menerima teguran dan halangan Tuhan,kenapa kau beri aku mata yang ketiga ini Scene: Meeting Lokasi: Koridor, Boardroom Soundtrack: Cancer by My Chemical Romance Nota kaki dan lutut: kita bias bila situasi itu punya kita dalamnya. Aku tak enak begitu. Aku buka mulut. Zass!zass! Perkataan aku dicantas. 2 kali. Hampeh tol.

Freak!

Syoknya hidup ini Sejak aku senyum dan melupakan Tiada lagi belenggu masalah Sekarang aku layak Join Cirque du Freak Atau the Carnival [of Heroes fame] Atau team penari Lady Gaga Sebab aku sekarang freak Sebab sekarang aku pelik Sebab aku kini manusia aneh Aku manusia Penelan Sengsara "Ladies and gentleman......... ...I'm the Painkiller Man! !!!" Scene : Sarkis Soundtrack : Bad Romance by Lady Gaga Author : http:// ashoulderon.blogspot.com