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Tuesday, November 22

Kind of

It's kind of hard
To miss somebody
but you just don't know who

It's kind of hard too
To miss somebody
but that somebody probably won't miss you back

It's kind of hard
To browse down the phone book
Just to find that you have nobody you can call

It's kind of hard, ya know...

Friday, November 18

Simple

I want to be simple
I want a short hair cut
So I won't waste half of my life
In front of the mirror twisting and tweaking my hair

I want to take a long shower
And sing while doing that
I want to wear a plain t shirt
And a pair of cheap jeans

I won't care about how people look at me
I want to laugh at jokes
Make fun of people
Be fun to people

I want to read novels
By the window
I want to lay on the grass
Under the shade of trees
Close my eyes, feel the breeze
Or watch the ever changing clouds

I want to be simple
I want to love myself
Don't care if others don't


Wednesday, November 2

I'm No You

I live my life careful, you see.
Because God make me imperfect.
I don't blame God, oh no.
I've learnt that this is just a test from Him.
Me being imperfect, is a test to me.

God may not judge me for who I am.
But who am I to stop anyone from judging me.

I'm afraid of what you think of me.
I'm afraid of the way you stare at me.
I'm afraid of what you have to say about me.
I'm afraid that you hate me.

I watched carefully the way I talk, walk; well... do things. 
Everything.
Each and every time.
So that, you won't hate me.

So, forgive me if I let loose a little.
Forgive me to rest for a while from being someone you'll like.
Forgive me if my letting loose a little, is an eyesore to you.

See,
I trust myself no more than you trusting me.
So forgive me if I don't trust you,
When you laugh to my joke,
When you smile when I'm around.
I don't deserve any of that,
no matter how much I long for it.

And sometime I'm too tired of being someone you might like.
It's lonely being the only actor on that stage, you see.
That's when things get the best of me.
Even the mightiest dam will broke eventually.
I'm tired of blaming myself.
I can't blame God. I won't.
So I blame you.
"Why can't you understand?"
"What's with that judging stares?"
"Can't you at least imagine being in my shoes?"

Boy, that broken dam is ugly.
Again, I'm sorry if you don't get me.
I'm twisted and complicated.
I'm just too tired.

I don't need you to love me.
I just need- acceptance.
That's it.
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